Saturday, March 28, 2015

#81 Lana Wood *

* - author has her autograph

It sucks when your older sister is about three times more popular than you are, even though she’s been dead for almost 35 years. Yup, Natalie Wood is Lana Wood’s sister, with Natalie returning 5.4 million hits on Google and Lana only 1.8. 

Though she has almost 70 acting credits (including lots of TV), Lana will probably always be remembered for her three-minute turn as Bond babe Plenty O’Toole in Diamonds Are Forever. You remember this bit of dialogue, don’t you:

Plenty O'Toole: "Hi, I'm Plenty."
James Bond: "But of course you are."
Plenty O'Toole: "Plenty O'Toole."
James Bond: "Named after your father perhaps?"

Embarrassing Real Name:  Svetlana Gurdin

Embarrassing Movies

  • Captain America II: Death Too Soon
  • Nightmare in Badham County
  • Scream Free
  • Satan’s Mistress (AKA Demon Rage)

Embarrassing Taglines

  • The jet action surf-set hits the beaches and captures a love-load of bikini beauties!
  • Crazy for speed and driving for revenge!
  • Love and Violence Form a Mind-Blowing Trip!!!

Embarrassing Characters

  • Tani
  • Santi
  • Zeld
  • New Blossom
  • Plenty O’Toole

Number of Marriages:  6

Shortest  Marriage:  1 month

Unlikely Spouses & Boyfriends

  • Eddie Fisher
  • Warren Beatty
  • Ryan O’Neal
  • Sean Connery

Whiffs of Scandal

  • Playboy appearances
  • Soft porn

Interesting Tidbits

  • Her parents barely spoke English
  • There’s actually a third sister, Olga
  • The Wood is in tribute to director Sam Wood
  • Made her debut at age 1 in one of Natalie’s films

Where can I learn more?


<#82          #80>

Saturday, March 21, 2015

#82 Salli Sachse

Poor Salli Sachse. She will be forever remembered primarily as one of Jackson Browne’s many girlfriends. Yup, in addition to Daryl Hannah, and Joni Mitchell, and Nico, and Laura Nyro, and Phoebe Snow, and Jaid Barrymore … there was Salli.

On the thespian side, Salli actually tallied only 17 credits, almost all of which were for beach movies. She did branch out at the end, though, with a handful of hot rod, biker, and youth-gone-wild flicks. To tell you the truth, it doesn’t seem like she was ever in anything that didn’t have “B” and “drive-in” written all over it.

Embarrassing Real Name:  Sally Rogers

Cheesy Pageant Titles

  • Miss La Jolla
  • Maid of California, runner-up

Embarrassing Movies

  • Beach Blanket Bingo
  • Muscle Beach Party
  • How To Stuff a Wild Bikini
  • The Ghost in the Invisible Bikini
  • Dr. Goldfoot and the Bikini Machine *
  • Wild in the Streets
  • Devil’s Angels *
* - author has seen

Embarrassing Taglines

  • FOR BEGINNERS AND EXPERTS... an interesting course in THE BIRDS... THE BEES and BIKINIS
  • It's where every torso is more so, and bare-as-you-dare is the rule!
  • Days of screaming wheels, nights of reckless pleasure!
  • Groovy Gravy!...The Trip is Out of Sight!

Embarrassing Characters

  • Beach Girl
  • Surfer Girl
  • Pajama Girl
  • Hippie Mother

Interesting Tidbits

  • Was the tour photographer for Crosby Stills Nash &Young
  • Has a Masters in psychology and worked as a therapist
  • Is quite an accomplished painter (see her site for more)

Where can I learn more?

Nice muffs!

<#83         #81>

Saturday, March 14, 2015

#83 Kathrine Baumann

A lot of the babes in this blog have beauty titles. Kathrine Baumann  may be the only one, however, who was an actual first runner-up Miss America. Somehow, though, all she managed to translate that into was some of the worst grade Z stuff out there.

If you Google her today, though, you’re most likely to get hits about jewelry. I’ll let her explain (from

In 1988, Baumann, launched Kathrine Baumann Beverly Hills, eventually becoming celebrated as the “Beverly Hills Bag Lady.” Combining her talent for design with her showmanship and experience as an actress, Baumann creates minaudieres [a small, decorative handbag without handles or a strap] that have established her, in the eyes of many around Hollywood as the “Queen of Hollywood’s Red Carpet.” Baumann has also been touted by CNN as the “female Andy Warhol.” Her clients have ranged from Joan Rivers and Suzanne Somers to actress Bai Ling and singer Dionne Warwick.

Embarrassing Real Birthplace:  Independence, OH

Pageant Titles

  • Miss Independence
  • Miss Ohio
  • Miss America, runner-up

Embarrassing Movies

  • Evel Knievel
  • Terror at Alacatraz
  • Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders *
  • Chrome and Hot Leather *
  • The Thing with Two Heads
* - author has seen

Embarrassing Taglines

  • It's kill or be killed in a cycle gang-war!
  • Don't muck around with a Green Beret's Mama! He'll take his chopper and ram it down your throat!
  • They transplanted a white bigot's head on a soul brother's body!

Interesting Tidbits:  Unless you’re interested in minaudieres, I’m afraid I don’t have a lot

Where can I learn more?

<#84          #82>

Saturday, March 7, 2015

#84 Jeanne Carmen

Jeanne Carmen is the first of our classic ‘50s-era platinum blondes. Though she had only 20 credits to her name, they were almost all classic stinkers. Interestingly, a lot of Jeanne’s notoriety comes from her extracurricular activities, including:
  • Being a real live Li’l Abner character (if growing up in Paragould AR, picking cotton as a child, and running away from home at age 13 counts)
  • Being a huge pinup star (in mags like Carnival, Dare, Glance, Pose and Titter), with no qualms about getting all nekkid
  • Hanging out with the Rat Pack
  • Being the first female trick shot golfer, including being able to hit a ball out of someone’s mouth 210 yards
By the way, there is quite an interesting photo out there that combines bullets 2 and 4. This is a family-oriented blog, though, so I won’t include it here and, instead, will let you get onto Google Images yourself (but not you, kid!).

Embarrassing Real Birthplace:  Paragould, AR

Cheesy Pageant Titles

  • Miss Orange Whip
  • Miss Potato Chip of 1954

Embarrassing Movies

  • Untamed Youth *
  • I Married a Woman
  • House of Women
  • The Devil’s Hand *
  • Striporama
  • The Naked Monster
* - author has seen

Embarrassing Taglines

  • They Carved a Scar of Ravaging Terror Across The West!
  • It struck with savage fury destroying ... killing all that crossed its path!
  • Youth turned “rock-n-roll” wild and the “punishment” farm that makes them wilder!
  • Secrets of the cells! Shame of inmates! Babies born in jails! Innocents thrown in with female bully-boys!!!! 

Embarrassing Characters

  • Mrs. Lipschitz
  • Blonde Cultist
  • Polimita
  • Serelda
  • Tassles Terhune

Shortest Marriage:  Less than a year

Unlikely Spouses & Boyfriends

  • Peter Lawford
  • Dean Martin
  • Frank Sinatra
  • Mobster Johnny Roselli
  • Sammy Davis Jr.
  • Ricardo Montalban
  • Telly Savalas
  • Errol Flynn
  • Clark Gable
  • Bob Hope
  • Jack Benny
  • Jerry Lewis
  • Howard Hughes
  • Elvis
  • RFK
  • JFK

Whiffs of Scandal:  Other than the mobsters and the nudity, you mean?

Interesting Tidbits

  • 38DD-26-36
  • Of French, Irish, and Native American descent
  • She claimed to be Marilyn Monroe’s BFF
  • Played a dominatrix in George Michael's video for "Outside," his comeback after being arrested for  “lewd acts” in a Los Angeles public lavatory

Where can I learn more?

Jeanne & (unknown) friend

<#85          #83>